are you serving me tea or malice?

The weather is increasingly hot and almost unbearable; however, I have learned to avoid anymore serious run-ins with the mosquitoes. THANK GOD! I have been busy at times, and not so busy at other times, so I apologize for slacking on my blog. Life is crazy like that, some of the most reliable people do the most unreliable things…Let me give you all a brief update as to my experiences here in India…Things have been difficult for me the past couple of days….I would say, I have learned more about the Indian culture in the past three weeks, than my entire stay here in India. A good example of this would be at lunch yesterday at Winnie’s house. Winnie’s youngest sister, Tinu, came to visit her and Ninnie, (Winnie’s eldest sister who is a doctor) as well as their 86 year old father. For the past couple of days, when I am not working at the centre, I have been tagging along with them to different places in Delhi. Yesterday, after a long day helping Tinu find gifts for her family back home and trudging along the sidewalks of the dozens of stores in the smoldering heat, we headed back to Winnie’s for lunch. As usual, Winnie always has a beautiful spread of what we simple Americans would call ‘lavish’. The General, Ninnie, Tinu, and Winnie, along with myself sat down to eat our lunch. Something I have always noticed is that when serving around the table the servants always skip me, and serve me close to last or last. Now, I wouldn’t mind this, as I don’t usually care about these things, (unless I am at home and mom serves Jessica before me), but it always seems as if they (the servants) go out of their way to do this, as I have noticed this happen on many occasions. I don’t know if it was the heat that had gotten to my head, or the frustration at not understanding why Shumshear (that is the head servant) skipped me when it would seem the only reasonable thing to do but to set the cup of tea next to my plate, but I was not having it this time, so very politely I asked the table: “I have always tried to be extra nice to the staff here, but I feel that, specifically, Shumshear doesn’t like me, I know this sounds petty, but I always notice that he skips me and serves me last.” There was silence at the table, and then Winnie and Ninnie started laughing. I immediately wanted to take back what I said, my mouth has always been my biggest downfall…(why did I have to ask, I thought to myself) After they stopped laughing they explained to me that everytime tea, in particular, is served, they serve mine the way I like it best, extra sweet and creamy, where as everyone else has their’s not sweet and much stronger.

My mind was expecting the worst out of someone, when in actuality; this individual was going out of their way to please me. There have been many moments in my life where I want to insert my foot into my mouth, but never have I had the urge to really bend down and bite all five toes! In my country were someone to do as Shumshear, we would think to ourselves, ‘why did he do that’. But in India, it is common knowledge that everyone’s tea is served a specific way, as the General says, in India, "we specialize in specialization"…. Perhaps in certain places back home this too is the case, but most of the time, if someone is serving tea, the host serves the same thing to everyone. Of course the elders are served first, this is par for the course at my home as well, but usually, we serve in the order of who is next to the person we just last served. Well, if that doesn’t beat all, then I don’t know what else does. I must say that being away from my home and my way of life has been an eye-opener as to how others live their lives. I know that the subject of being served first as opposed to last merely seems petty and not worth mentioning, but to me, this was the best and shortest way to explain that simple things like the order in which tea is served, can cause an individual, such as myself, to become confused and even a little offended. It is not always a very pleasant experience, that is, learning to understand other people's way of life, but it definitely is something that everyone must experience. There have been so many of these “experiences” that I can’t write them all down, and most would probably bore you, for most of the time we barely notice our mannerisms until we experience something that doesn’t resemble what we are most familiar with.

We all want to believe that the way we live our lives is the best way in which we know to do it, so many times when we encounter others that live their lives differently from ours, we are either tempted to make suggested improvements, or we shy away from those that do not resemble what is most familiar to us. Perhaps it is because we fear what we don't know, or maybe it is because it is more comfortable to be ignorant than to be enlightened to life's infinite possibilities. It can be too overwhelming for some to even imagine all life's possibilities. It is never easy to evaluate our inner-selves, and even less easy to admit to our imperfections. For the first time, I am starting to understand the importance of my own individuality and my willingness to question uniformity. Yet, I am also learning to address my own fears and prejudices, for we all have them.

"Our deepest fears and prejudices hide in the remote depths of our souls, only to be seen at the most opportune moment."-K

I am who I am~K

When He gives us gifts, we sometimes forget to notice them....

The temperatures here in Delhi us like that of a furnace. Every time I step outside, the heat attempts to bake me into a crisp brownie; while mosquitoes think I AM a chocolate brownie!!!! Both sets of arms, legs, and feet have borne the brunt of their feast. The bug spray I purchased from the states happens to be their favorite flavor, so I have opted to trash the “OFF” and purchase the heavy duty “Odomos” that is the mosquito repellant of choice for local Indians, but if I may be perfectly honest, I fear that Indian mosquitoes just like the taste of American blood. As the long dark brown arms of summer close in on India, so to does the increase of inversion, power outages, traffic, and new species of bugs…. especially the mosquito!

I have finally cranked the AC up to full blast at Som Vihar, and run all fans in every room to keep some air circulating throughout the house. I have always thought that Texas and Arizona were the hottest places on Earth, yet India has decided to set me straight for the record, it seems now, India is the hottest place! I have grown used to sweat sliding down my back, arms, and forehead, and one grows thankful for that small bit of moisture. In India, as I have mentioned before, one grows thankful for the small gifts in life, such the ability to sweat, as we so many times forget the small gifts God gave us. He really did think of everything!

Work at the centre in Ekta Vihar has been a little slow since, I made an unexpected trip down to the South of India in a state called Goa. (please take a look at all my pictures on the far right) I did A LOT of ngo networking for Maitri as well as A LOT of sightseeing, swimming, and writing. Goa is a place unbeknownst to many, yet, once one has entered into its’ magical realm, one can’t understand why…. As my plane began its’ entrance from the thick sheet of clouds that cloaked the capital city of Goa, Panaji, I was struck by the magnificence of the jungle and the sparkling jewels that seemed to float on the top of the Arabian Sea that lines the coast of the state. Once I exited the plane and took the bus to the airport, I was met by the driver that would be taking me to all my destinations throughout my stay. One of the first things I noticed about Panaji, and Goa for that matter is the rich history that the Portuguese left behind after nearly 4 ½ centuries of rule. Mixed with the local culture of Goa is a rich Portuguese Catholic culture that is seen in the architecture, religion, and food. Small sanctuaries honoring the Blessed Virgin and the Crusifix lined the roads, city streets, and were present in the lone spice fields that scattered the country side and in between cities. In most sections and corners of this world, religion continues to be the source of many wars, fights, deaths, and evil, yet in this secluded, almost mysterious place, the Hindus, Sikhs, Catholics, Muslims, and any other faith present honored eachother. Whether I visited someone’s home, business, school, or just a public area there was communion of cultures and spirituality. Where one would see the Blessed Virgin and Her Son, one too would see Ganesh, Shiva, Guru Nanak, and the local Gods and Goddesses of the Goan people sitting side by side as if they where family members hanging on the wall at home. While I am a devout Christian, and at that, a Catholic, I was so proud to see such unity and acceptance in this mystical place. Catholic churches, cathedrals, monuments, and art crowed every available space in Goa as if they too had grown naturally like the coconut trees, lilies, and bunion trees, but it wasn’t the manmade structures that demanded one look with wonder, or the sacred places throughout the island, but the life in which carried on around these brilliant structures. People from every walk of life cluttered the streets, while cars, horses, monkeys, bikes, and small school children moved with a purpose to their perspective location. In the early mornings I would watch the mothers in their traditional dress walking their young girls and boys dressed smartly in crisp pinafore dresses or nicely creased trousers and ties. Nuns carefully guarded their flocks of girls and boys to their morning masses and classes, as fishermen loaded their early morning catch into large buckets of ice. In the air, coconuts, fish, fresh flowers, sea water, and sweat scented the air with a unique and yet familiar smell…life! While every place has its’ own distinct smell, the scent of Goa will forever be in my memory….While God blesses us everyday with small gifts, that many times we forget to notice, it never ceases to amaze me at the large gifts, such as Goa, that we also fail to miss as well.